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Re: please review new cryptsetup template



Christian PERRIER wrote:
> _Description: Continue with cryptsetup removal?
>  Some unlocked dm-crypt devices (${cryptmap}) are in use on this system.

If ${cryptmap} expands to a plain whitespace-separated list it's less
ugly to move it to the end.  And here's a shorter way of avoiding
second person:

   This system has unlocked dm-crypt devices: ${cryptmap}

>  .
>  If these devices are managed with cryptsetup, you might be unable to
>  lock the devices after the package removal, though other tools can be
>  used for managing dm-crypt devices. As a consequence, any further
>  system shutdown or reboot is likely to lock the devices.

You've lost the tools for locking them, and *therefore* a reboot will
lock them?  That sounds more like a "however".  I'd suggest reverting
it slightly to just:

   Any system shutdown or reboot will lock the devices.

[...]

>> Package: cryptsetup
[...]
>> Description: configures encrypted block devices
> 
> "encrypted devices management tools"?
> 
> A verb sentence is discouraged in synopsis. Better use a noun phrase.
> 
> I'm unsure whether crypsetup provides tools for general encrypted
> devices management or only tools to set them up, but you get the point.

It seems to me that all this talk of devices is more abstract and
technical than there's any call for in a synopsis.  Users searching
for cryptsetup aren't necessarily thinking in terms of needing to
configure a device - they're more likely to be looking for a way to
"lock my home directory"...

I won't try to dumb it all the way down to that level, but maybe we
could use something like:

   Description: disk encryption support - commandline tools

(And then of course "- library", "- development files", etc.  The word
"commandline" is promoted out of the description, thus allowing us not
to use that word in the description for the library etc.)

>>  Cryptsetup provides a command-line interface for configuring encrypted
>>  devices. This is done using the Linux kernel device mapper target
>>  dm-crypt. This version of cryptsetup has integrated support for LUKS.

It doesn't configure devices which are encrypted, it sets up
encryption on devices.  Meanwhile we've lost "block devices" in the
synopsis, but here there's room for all that plus a parenthesised
outbreak of handholding.

  Cryptsetup provides an interface for configuring encryption on block
  devices (such as /home or swap partitions), using the Linux kernel
  device mapper target dm-crypt.

I've demoted the bit about LUKS into the second paragraph on suspicion
of being stale news about an implementation detail. 

>>  .
>>  cryptsetup is backwards compatible with the on-disk format of cryptoloop,
>>  but also supports more secure formats. This package includes support for
>>  automatically configuring encrypted devices at boot time via the config
>>  file /etc/crypttab. Additional features are cryptoroot support through
>>  initramfs-tools and several supported ways to read a passphrase or key.
> 
> Maybe avoid the leading lowercase in 2nd paragraph, which always looks
> ugly. Otherwise, no comment.

It's especially odd given that the first para had "Cryptsetup".  We
might as well say "It".

I spent a while trying to turn this into a bulleted list, but on
second thoughts the original format is fine.

    It features integrated LUKS (Linux Unified Key Setup) support, and is
    backwards compatible with the on-disk format of cryptoloop, but also
    supports more secure formats. This package includes support for
    automatically configuring encrypted devices at boot time via the config
    file /etc/crypttab. Additional features are cryptoroot support through
    initramfs-tools and several supported ways to read a passphrase or key.

(Or would it make more sense to mention LUKS alongside the "more secure
formats"?)
-- 
JBR	with qualifications in linguistics, experience as a Debian
	sysadmin, and probably no clue about this particular package

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