Re: Some thoughts about Diversity and the CoC
Hey,
I've been using and teaching debian for years now, and have mostly been
thinking the community was friendly and dealing with consensus seeking
with good faith.
Nevertheless, I've also been thinking that being really involved in the
debian community as a queer (not straight or not binary cisgendered)
must be a harsh thing. I've never been deeply into debian though.
I am myself a transwomen, and reading tina's post made me angry and sad
at the debian community. It also revived my never ending hopeless wish
to see things change. Tina you have my full (but sadly pretty much
useless) support.
I eventually read most posts of this thread on -project@.
What I see from my far position is just the same as everywhere else:
some cis-gendered guys have behaviors and words that have very violent
consequences. They don't even realize (or maybe do, but who cares). Then
some people gather courage and call out the violence. Then some other
show up and say their vision on the situation (who asked?). And some
support the persons who got headshot by the
sexist/homophobic/transphobic/racist/ableist/whatever violence.
I have seen many messages stating that one should always respect the CoC
when answering hate messages such as the ones from norbert and gerardo.
I want to say that this is *bullshit*. This is bullshit because the
violence *has been there already*, when people have refused to respect
genders and names other people use. And I can assure you, I would prefer
to be told 1000 times that i'm a hasshole than 10 times misgendered or
deadnamed. There is just no way to compare a violence where people feel
hurt because of an insult with a violence where people feel like they
don't have the f*ckin right to exist and have a word to say about *their
own identity*. Plus that violence is a systemic violence. It doens't
only come from individuals, it comes from the media, the police, the
state, at school, at work, at home, in the music, in the movies, in
front of big groups or with our best friends.
So, please stop calling such nice answers "violent". If I wanted to be
violent against transphobic people I'd just go find them and break their
knees with a baseball bat. That would be kind of violent I reckon.
I am also sad to see people make jokes or be cynical in this thread. I'm
sorry you cis-gendered straight, but you just don't get it: we HAVE THE
RIGHT TO BE HERE and cannot respond to your violence better than we do.
Your jokes and sealioning and misrespect are bullets that violently
crush in our bullet-kinda-proof jacket, we get hurt a lot, but we get up
again, and we strive to keep standing up, and we will never give up.
I've also read multiple times that debian or individuals should not take
positions on political things. Please remember that not taking position
*is taking position for the dominant*. So yes, Debian *must* take
position (and it already does on many topics), and individuals should
too, if they don't want to support the mainstream/dominant ideas and
behaviors.
norbert:
> gerardo:
>> I had thought that there was room for a dissenting opinion, but
>> clearly there isn't.
>
> Unfortunately there isn't, but room for insults and aggressions, if they
> come from the "correct" group.
We are not talking about opinions or positions. I think Rhonda said it
very well[1]. You gender normals males have the right and place to
express your emetic thoughts mostly everywhere (when it's about gender,
at least). I hope Debian can stay a place where marginalized people can
speak and be listened to.
Regarding the "correct" group, please, gender normals males, remember
that YOU are the freaking correct group. YOU have all gender-related
privileges. I don't have to bring facts here right? You know that already.
sam:
> I personally hope that we choose to respect people always--even when
> they do not respect us in return.
If you also mean "we choose to always respect people, even when they did
not respect us before", then take a punch in your face 50 times a day
and try to gently ask for help. You will scream, I would bet!
As a last thing, I'd like to say that in this whole mess I have seen
quite a lot of support for tina and what she said, and this makes me
less angry and sad than right after reading her first email. Thank you
for showing up, taking a risk in telling your support, and making this
debate not be flooded by bigots all the time.
My solidarity goes to women, transgenders, non-binary folks, faggots,
dykes, people of color, lesbians, gays, people with different abilities,
the fat, the youngests, the oldests, the weirdoes, the freaks, the ones
that have died for their survivance, the ones who are still alive and
fighting.
gagz
PS: To everyone on this list, I recommend you watch Hannah Gadsby
"Nanette" show.
[1]: https://lists.debian.org/debian-project/2019/12/msg00075.html
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